Pictre This !!!!!!
One not so big hall, with a so called DJ / MC shouting for ppl to jump in the air for the crappy music they were playing on one side, and on the other side the so called "educated people" pushing and falling on each other just to get a hold of a glass of Beer. The poor helpless bartender carelessly pouring glass after glass of frothing matter and pushing it across the counter. Saw the proof of the whole "Survival Of the Fittest" theory !!!!!
No.. i wont end the story there, there is more !!!!
The small 5ft x 5ft wooden platform at the foot of the DJ's console was termed as the "Dance Floor". Well, what can u dance (even if u remotely felt like it) on such a place which had more than a 100 strong Men, each at least 2 mugs of beer into their bellies, oblivious (?) of their surroundings, shaking violently to the blaring sound from the speakers !!!!
Those poor ladies had to flee out of the testosterone pool so save a few embarrassing moments....
Anyways, the highlight of the whole event ...... I just found more abt Myself !!!!!!!
If this is what people term as a "New Year Bash", I am just thanking my stars that I did not start a whole new year with this, but learnt How Not to start one !!!!! Happy that its over now, and i can put it back with all the Memories of 2007, which I wish to forget !!!!
If at all I could do the Memory Charm on myself now........
18.10.07
A Ride Back Home........
Never Ever did i even remotely think in my wildest dreams that a ride back home, at 8 PM on a weekday, with a light drizzle all the way would get me back onto my senses... and leave me energized all over again !!!!!
A total bounce of the DB....i must say :)
Yes, this was the break which i wanted from the now so normal 10 AM to 10 PM routine, which had emerged out of nowhere !!!!!!!
waiting for the next rain in Bluru !!!
A total bounce of the DB....i must say :)
Yes, this was the break which i wanted from the now so normal 10 AM to 10 PM routine, which had emerged out of nowhere !!!!!!!
waiting for the next rain in Bluru !!!
28.9.07
10.9.07
Story of our lives....
Every one of us can atleast in some way or the other can relate to this one..... rite ??? ;)
Testing Times.........
Yeah... tats wat these are.....
An age old saying in kannada goes this way.... ಮನೆ ಕಟ್ಟಿ ನೊಡು, ಮದುವೆ ಮಾಡಿ ನೊಡು .....
Even though i had heard this before, never had i given a second thought to the proverb.... until very recently !!!!!
Do i consider it my luck or unluck for being too young to realize the difficulties my parents went through while building a house, or do i consider my self lucky or unlucky to be old enough to realize the difficulties my parents are going through for my sister's wedding...... leaves me CoNfUsEd :)
A nice thought shared by my uncle which goes something like this ..... " An experience, until totally assimilated by the body, isnt a true experience, but just an event " ..... and another one where he told about the tolerance levels of the people (Shall write abt in a much more detail, some other time).... have started making some sense .... but still lays just out of reach when i try to relate the happenings, and the thought.... but somehow i know tat it might just explain the whole thing.........
I've always been taught abt the belief of Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam ...... How good it will be for everyone to live in harmony with each other.... giving each other the required space, and thus getting our own space in return......
The Questions keep coming again and again to me..... This time about Rituals, and the ultimate Goal ..... This time, both are so intricately related to each other, that it leave me feeling pity for everyone involved .... When do we realize that Nothing Else Matters other than the happiness of the long lasting relationship ?????
Got lots to tell, but i shall restrain from it...... Hope that everything turns out roses at the end :)
सर्वँ श्री कृष्णरपनमस्टु
An age old saying in kannada goes this way.... ಮನೆ ಕಟ್ಟಿ ನೊಡು, ಮದುವೆ ಮಾಡಿ ನೊಡು .....
Even though i had heard this before, never had i given a second thought to the proverb.... until very recently !!!!!
Do i consider it my luck or unluck for being too young to realize the difficulties my parents went through while building a house, or do i consider my self lucky or unlucky to be old enough to realize the difficulties my parents are going through for my sister's wedding...... leaves me CoNfUsEd :)
A nice thought shared by my uncle which goes something like this ..... " An experience, until totally assimilated by the body, isnt a true experience, but just an event " ..... and another one where he told about the tolerance levels of the people (Shall write abt in a much more detail, some other time).... have started making some sense .... but still lays just out of reach when i try to relate the happenings, and the thought.... but somehow i know tat it might just explain the whole thing.........
I've always been taught abt the belief of Vasudhaiva Kutumbakam ...... How good it will be for everyone to live in harmony with each other.... giving each other the required space, and thus getting our own space in return......
The Questions keep coming again and again to me..... This time about Rituals, and the ultimate Goal ..... This time, both are so intricately related to each other, that it leave me feeling pity for everyone involved .... When do we realize that Nothing Else Matters other than the happiness of the long lasting relationship ?????
Got lots to tell, but i shall restrain from it...... Hope that everything turns out roses at the end :)
सर्वँ श्री कृष्णरपनमस्टु
9.9.07
Karma ????
How many of us actually believe in the whole concept of Karma ???? Has it just been reduced to a simple phrase to pass off the unexpected/unwanted doings of a person, or is there any more deeper meaning to the whole concept ???
C'on.... the ancient saints and thinkers of India, wouldn't have come up with the concept just for the heck of it right ??? Moreover, when Swji said that "Man is the maker of his Own Destiny", was he in a way referring to this concept ???
Well, i've come to believe in this philosophy to a great extent now..... atleast after what i witnessed today......
A question on my mind, which troubled me for quite some sleepless nights.....Why are some people more richer (Both materialistically, and intellectually) , while some lesser ???? Why are there so many Good people around, equal (if not more) number of so called not-so-good ones ??? Why is there this inherent difference, we find (atleast according to my limited knowledge) only in the Human Beings, and not in any other animal clan ???
After a fun filled evening out with some friends, the sight which brought tears in my eyes was that of an old woman, sitting outside the "Hang Out" wearing a torn sweater, the thin saree covered her fragile head against the drizzle..... her bright eyes looked expectantly at mine (while i so conveniently looked away), she sat with her arms outstretched ........ i would surely have given her a few rupees, if at all i had any low denomination notes in my wallet, all i had was 100 bucks, which i wanted to fill petrol
What have i done to deserve this good a life i have now ?? Am i so worth it ?? I sometimes do genuinely ask...... and wat sort of a life will i get after all the things i've done in this one of mine ????? I dare not know the answer..... unless i still have the opportunity to change the outcome....
Whats troubling me now, and will continue for a while i am sure, is tat i could've used my credit card to fill petrol......
C'on.... the ancient saints and thinkers of India, wouldn't have come up with the concept just for the heck of it right ??? Moreover, when Swji said that "Man is the maker of his Own Destiny", was he in a way referring to this concept ???
Well, i've come to believe in this philosophy to a great extent now..... atleast after what i witnessed today......
A question on my mind, which troubled me for quite some sleepless nights.....Why are some people more richer (Both materialistically, and intellectually) , while some lesser ???? Why are there so many Good people around, equal (if not more) number of so called not-so-good ones ??? Why is there this inherent difference, we find (atleast according to my limited knowledge) only in the Human Beings, and not in any other animal clan ???
After a fun filled evening out with some friends, the sight which brought tears in my eyes was that of an old woman, sitting outside the "Hang Out" wearing a torn sweater, the thin saree covered her fragile head against the drizzle..... her bright eyes looked expectantly at mine (while i so conveniently looked away), she sat with her arms outstretched ........ i would surely have given her a few rupees, if at all i had any low denomination notes in my wallet, all i had was 100 bucks, which i wanted to fill petrol
What have i done to deserve this good a life i have now ?? Am i so worth it ?? I sometimes do genuinely ask...... and wat sort of a life will i get after all the things i've done in this one of mine ????? I dare not know the answer..... unless i still have the opportunity to change the outcome....
Whats troubling me now, and will continue for a while i am sure, is tat i could've used my credit card to fill petrol......
31.8.07
hmmm......
I was feeling hungry and bored too.... so thought of stopping at the Ulsoor lake for some fresh air... she started grumbling the moment we left the place....... and it was then that she snapped !!!!
wat would i do ????
bang in the middle of the road, a few feet away from a busy circle, she refused to move on.... amidst curious eyes staring at us and impatient ppl honking their horns, i tried to tame her and get her to the side of the road, where i could have a look at her and figure out wat the whole fuss was about, guilt of neglecting her all these days hit me hard.......
wat happened later is a looooong story, rather, i had to push her a looooong way to find the nearest mechanic to help me out.......
My only mistake all these days was tat i took her for granted....... I mean, when i cant take a bloddy bike for granted, how can i take a person who lives and breaths and has feelings, for granted ????????
Learnt my lesson the hard way today :)
wat would i do ????
bang in the middle of the road, a few feet away from a busy circle, she refused to move on.... amidst curious eyes staring at us and impatient ppl honking their horns, i tried to tame her and get her to the side of the road, where i could have a look at her and figure out wat the whole fuss was about, guilt of neglecting her all these days hit me hard.......
wat happened later is a looooong story, rather, i had to push her a looooong way to find the nearest mechanic to help me out.......
My only mistake all these days was tat i took her for granted....... I mean, when i cant take a bloddy bike for granted, how can i take a person who lives and breaths and has feelings, for granted ????????
Learnt my lesson the hard way today :)
14.8.07
The Dream......
I once had a dream.....
a dream which seemed so perfect at that time, a dream which a small little part of me somehow thought would become possible some day..... I mean, I know I have it in me to be a part of the Indian Armed Forces ...... rite ????
6 years ago, when i had cleared the NDA exam, little did i know tat i had made a mistake... a mistake coz it still remains in my mind, keeps reminding me tat i might still have a chance..... a chance to wear proudly, the Indian tricolor on my chest......
From getting royally blasted, to being totally encouraged, i've got all sorts of comments and feedbacks, all sorts of gyaan about this dream of mine..... a Dream, which still remains ......
This Independence Day, as i sit back and think, the ghost tries to return.....peeping from within the shadows.... but this time, i am stronger... stronger to face the ghosts of the past.......and ready to embrace the present........
.....with tears in my eyes, I Dream On....... but this time, its about our country....
A new Dream.... A bigger picture..... A soon to be reality !!!!!
Proud to be an INDIAN
a dream which seemed so perfect at that time, a dream which a small little part of me somehow thought would become possible some day..... I mean, I know I have it in me to be a part of the Indian Armed Forces ...... rite ????
6 years ago, when i had cleared the NDA exam, little did i know tat i had made a mistake... a mistake coz it still remains in my mind, keeps reminding me tat i might still have a chance..... a chance to wear proudly, the Indian tricolor on my chest......
From getting royally blasted, to being totally encouraged, i've got all sorts of comments and feedbacks, all sorts of gyaan about this dream of mine..... a Dream, which still remains ......
This Independence Day, as i sit back and think, the ghost tries to return.....peeping from within the shadows.... but this time, i am stronger... stronger to face the ghosts of the past.......and ready to embrace the present........
.....with tears in my eyes, I Dream On....... but this time, its about our country....
A new Dream.... A bigger picture..... A soon to be reality !!!!!
Proud to be an INDIAN
3.8.07
The Blame .....
........Tyranny of the outside world ?????
........The shackles of the self-created Misery ?????
Choose yr pick !!!!
........The shackles of the self-created Misery ?????
Choose yr pick !!!!
2.8.07
2'O Clock....
yeah.. its exctly 2 AM when i start to write this......
and y am i writing ??? i really dunno !!! well, it could be as simple as " I am Bored !!! " or as complicated as trying to find a reason for the sudden feeling of loneliness/loss or watever its called when u get bak home after dropping a couple of friends (to the Airport) u've known for over 5 years.......
Time just flies rite ??? its already an year since i had to go thro the whole ordeal...... friends whom i knew for over 7-8 years, friends whom i've closely bonded for no reason (or a whole lot of reasons).....
ppl who had never ever met before in life, one fine day, decide to join the same coll and course.... marks the beginning of a great friendship..... ppl from whom i've learnt so much in life, have moved on......
Y is it that even though some ppl are not a part of our everyday life, mean so much to us ???
is it jealousy that creeps in, thinking that such good friendship will eventually break apart and those so called friends, will find a new gang of friends and their relationship will blossom, leaving the old one to wither away.....
well..... i am searching for answers.... answers which i dont think i'll ever get........
and y am i writing ??? i really dunno !!! well, it could be as simple as " I am Bored !!! " or as complicated as trying to find a reason for the sudden feeling of loneliness/loss or watever its called when u get bak home after dropping a couple of friends (to the Airport) u've known for over 5 years.......
Time just flies rite ??? its already an year since i had to go thro the whole ordeal...... friends whom i knew for over 7-8 years, friends whom i've closely bonded for no reason (or a whole lot of reasons).....
ppl who had never ever met before in life, one fine day, decide to join the same coll and course.... marks the beginning of a great friendship..... ppl from whom i've learnt so much in life, have moved on......
Y is it that even though some ppl are not a part of our everyday life, mean so much to us ???
is it jealousy that creeps in, thinking that such good friendship will eventually break apart and those so called friends, will find a new gang of friends and their relationship will blossom, leaving the old one to wither away.....
well..... i am searching for answers.... answers which i dont think i'll ever get........
1.8.07
The Journey or the End ????
What is more important ????
I've come to believe (after gaining a respectable knowledge of life for the past 22 years) that every journey has an end....(reaching the end is a different issue altogether) and the end marks the start of a new journey........
But thinking abt it makes me wonder..... ultimately does the end matter more or the journey (even if the journey doesnt meet the expected end.....where ever it ends.... is the end of the journey.....rite ????) This again raises a question..... are the various journeys interwoven, which makes the demarcation a much more complicated issue or are we just plain blind not to see the simplicity in the whole complicated structure ????
What i am hoping for (and trying to perceive) now is that no matter which of the two is more important, may we all get the strength and the patience to make the journey... and reach a meaningful end.....in the end.....
But... what/where is the END ????
I am left CoNfUsEd !!!!!
I've come to believe (after gaining a respectable knowledge of life for the past 22 years) that every journey has an end....(reaching the end is a different issue altogether) and the end marks the start of a new journey........
But thinking abt it makes me wonder..... ultimately does the end matter more or the journey (even if the journey doesnt meet the expected end.....where ever it ends.... is the end of the journey.....rite ????) This again raises a question..... are the various journeys interwoven, which makes the demarcation a much more complicated issue or are we just plain blind not to see the simplicity in the whole complicated structure ????
What i am hoping for (and trying to perceive) now is that no matter which of the two is more important, may we all get the strength and the patience to make the journey... and reach a meaningful end.....in the end.....
But... what/where is the END ????
I am left CoNfUsEd !!!!!
28.6.07
Kid on the Skooter.....
8:15 AM... 15 yrs ago, I used to sit behind my dad, hugging his tummy, and be on my way to skool.... knowing that my sis would not let me fall off the skooter even if i fell asleep......
8:15 AM... 15 yrs later, I see a small kid, wearing a monkey cap and a blue sweater (2 sizes too big for him) over the uniform, dozing off to glory, hugging his dad's tummy, under the watchful eyes of his sister sitting behind him......
How life changes !!!!
I would give ANYTHING to go back in time...... if at all it was so easy :)
15.6.07
The Reminder....
9:30 PM on a weekday..... boredom kicks in.... and i decide to do some long pending moderating activity on one of the Orkut Communities.
That is where I came across this beautiful video about my skool... the same skool which has given me so many good memories, so many good friends, so many good values, the same skool which has taught me how to live life, how to respect others...... the same skool which has made me what i am today...
The humble reminder couldn't have come at a better time.....
The facts so conveniently forgotten, have been well reminded.......
The time is just to prove that all it takes is pure mental strength..... and nothing else :)
29.5.07
Simplicity......
The wait in the Office, just to look good in front of Boss's eyes........
15 Kms of extra travel, in Blore's crawling traffic.......
The honks and the snarls, the careless pedestrians' way thro the jigsaw puzzle,
The feeling that I wont be on time to meet Him,
To meet Him before he embarks on a long journey,
To meet Him to get His Blessings......The tension, The Apprehension......
!!!.....The immediate realization of the simplicity amidst the complexity......!!!
The smile !!! :)
The Smile, filled with warmth and pride which HE gave, when he came to know that the money was earned by me..... PRICELESS !!!!
These are just among some very few things in Life, which makes it worth living :)
Peace !!
15 Kms of extra travel, in Blore's crawling traffic.......
The honks and the snarls, the careless pedestrians' way thro the jigsaw puzzle,
The feeling that I wont be on time to meet Him,
To meet Him before he embarks on a long journey,
To meet Him to get His Blessings......The tension, The Apprehension......
!!!.....The immediate realization of the simplicity amidst the complexity......!!!
The smile !!! :)
The Smile, filled with warmth and pride which HE gave, when he came to know that the money was earned by me..... PRICELESS !!!!
These are just among some very few things in Life, which makes it worth living :)
Peace !!
28.5.07
Back to the Roots !!!
Yes..... after trying out a number of difft fonts, templates, colors and styles, I've reverted back to the original style.....
......some things are best kept the way they originally were.......
!.!
......some things are best kept the way they originally were.......
!.!
Something to call "My Own" !!!!
Yes !!!!
Finally it has happened !!!!
Wondering what ????? chk this out (the result Google God gives when u search for a quote) !!!!!!
A one liner, which I can claim, MY OWN !!!!! an absolute original !!!
"If at all I knew the source code of my life, debugging it would've been much simpler !!!!! "
an ego boost ???? i dont think so :)
Finally it has happened !!!!
Wondering what ????? chk this out (the result Google God gives when u search for a quote) !!!!!!
A one liner, which I can claim, MY OWN !!!!! an absolute original !!!
"If at all I knew the source code of my life, debugging it would've been much simpler !!!!! "
an ego boost ???? i dont think so :)
21.5.07
From Black to White.....
Why the change ?????
When almost everything else in life is changing.....Y not this too ??????
:)
P.S I am gonna keep on changing the templates and the backgrounds, until i find the perfect combo !!
When almost everything else in life is changing.....Y not this too ??????
:)
P.S I am gonna keep on changing the templates and the backgrounds, until i find the perfect combo !!
20.5.07
Explainations......????
U know U havent done any mistake.......................But U could've prevented a disaster from happenin,
U know U tried to stop it from happening..............But ppl dont know it,
U know U were not involved....................................But U knew it was happening,
U know U didnt want it to happen.......................... But who the hell listens to U ?,
U know that U are sorry for the whole ordeal...... But ppl dont listen,
U know that U are not wrong...................................But ppl have their own perceptions
Isnt this a torture in itself ???? When u know that there has been a BIG mistake.....and there is NOTHING anyone in particular can do abt it........??? The only solace is in the person forgiving the lesser mortals.... But is it that easy ??!!!
The situation is further complicated with the increase in the number of people who come to know abt the situation..... a couple of them genuinely interested to solve, but a majority, just plain curious ...!!!
The End Result ....................
...........................The change in the perception of the people..........
How do I even Explain !!!???? Do I even need to Explain ???!!! !.!
U know U tried to stop it from happening..............But ppl dont know it,
U know U were not involved....................................But U knew it was happening,
U know U didnt want it to happen.......................... But who the hell listens to U ?,
U know that U are sorry for the whole ordeal...... But ppl dont listen,
U know that U are not wrong...................................But ppl have their own perceptions
Isnt this a torture in itself ???? When u know that there has been a BIG mistake.....and there is NOTHING anyone in particular can do abt it........??? The only solace is in the person forgiving the lesser mortals.... But is it that easy ??!!!
The situation is further complicated with the increase in the number of people who come to know abt the situation..... a couple of them genuinely interested to solve, but a majority, just plain curious ...!!!
The End Result ....................
...........................The change in the perception of the people..........
How do I even Explain !!!???? Do I even need to Explain ???!!! !.!
2.5.07
The Differences ????
Out of the several Billion ppl on this earth, how is it tat NONE of us are even remotely alike ??? i mean, both physically and in the mental make up..... or are we all so blinded, tat we fail to see the striking similarities within us all????
I mean, after all, we ALL are humans, and as Swji says "Each soul is potentially divine" .....
......The thought bothering me is.......Why do we get happiness out of the failure of another person ??? Why is it that instead of trying to improve our weaknesses, we try to increase other ppl's weaknesses ??? Why is it that we tend to talk (esp bad, and rarely good) abt others behind their backs ??? why do we fail to realize that "we" who talk such stuff, are a part of the same society, the same being about whom we are talking..... After all, what is it that we gain out of the whole ordeal ????
NOTHING ... !!!!
Well, if we consider, getting a lil bit of praise from our (like minded) peers, a lil boost to our own stupid ego or even worse, if we tend to show ourselves as some sort of "Heros" before our peers, then i am sorry, we still have a Looooong way to go in life........and a lot of things to learn from it too.......
Cant we just take the person for whom he/she is ??? are we so self centered , that we expect the other person to act according to OUR wishes ??? How would we feel if someone spoke/spread rumours abt us ??? ever wondered abt that ???
Who teaches us all these things ??? i dont remember any lesson in our text books which taught us these values.... then y is it that most of us pick up the bad part so easily and fail to realize the existance of the good part ??? Does a new born baby come programmed with all these subtle values, and forgets it as it grows up, or do we never learn these things ???
I always wonder...... But all i can pray for, is this :
Dhiyo Yo Nah Prachodayat.......
Dhiyo: the intellect,understanding
Yo: May this light
Nah: our
Prachodayath: enlighten,guide,inspire
May this light enlighten/guide/inspire our intellect/understanding......
Amen !!!
I mean, after all, we ALL are humans, and as Swji says "Each soul is potentially divine" .....
......The thought bothering me is.......Why do we get happiness out of the failure of another person ??? Why is it that instead of trying to improve our weaknesses, we try to increase other ppl's weaknesses ??? Why is it that we tend to talk (esp bad, and rarely good) abt others behind their backs ??? why do we fail to realize that "we" who talk such stuff, are a part of the same society, the same being about whom we are talking..... After all, what is it that we gain out of the whole ordeal ????
NOTHING ... !!!!
Well, if we consider, getting a lil bit of praise from our (like minded) peers, a lil boost to our own stupid ego or even worse, if we tend to show ourselves as some sort of "Heros" before our peers, then i am sorry, we still have a Looooong way to go in life........and a lot of things to learn from it too.......
Cant we just take the person for whom he/she is ??? are we so self centered , that we expect the other person to act according to OUR wishes ??? How would we feel if someone spoke/spread rumours abt us ??? ever wondered abt that ???
Who teaches us all these things ??? i dont remember any lesson in our text books which taught us these values.... then y is it that most of us pick up the bad part so easily and fail to realize the existance of the good part ??? Does a new born baby come programmed with all these subtle values, and forgets it as it grows up, or do we never learn these things ???
I always wonder...... But all i can pray for, is this :
Dhiyo Yo Nah Prachodayat.......
Dhiyo: the intellect,understanding
Yo: May this light
Nah: our
Prachodayath: enlighten,guide,inspire
May this light enlighten/guide/inspire our intellect/understanding......
Amen !!!
22.4.07
The Answers......
1'30 on a Monday morning, eyes burning, I decide to Rant......!!!!!!!
I read a very interesting part in Bhagawad Gita last night, Krishna says
"
Karmanyevadhikaraste ma phaleshu kadachana
Ma karmaphalaheturbhuh ma te sango'svakarmani -2.47
" Your right is to work only; but never to the fruits thereof. May you not be motivated by fruits of actions; nor let your attachment be towards inaction"
An absolutely beautiful thought.....!!!!!! how many of us work day in and day out, just to quench our selfish needs, just to get recognition, just to reap the fruits of those actions ???? well, i would be lying if i didnt accept the fact, each one of us, at some point or the other, would've done some job just for pure selfish needs.... rite ??? I think i wouldnt be wrong in even goin further and tellin tat we would've done it to satisfy our EGOs ......
It was an interesting comment my friend made in my previous blog abt Ego, well, to an extent it is true watever he has expressed, but i needed a better explaination, a deeper meaning to the whole Ego Question of mine....
I happened to come across this book called "The Science of Life" by Julian Huxley, HG Wells and GP Wells.... Here is a small excerpt from the book which i liked the most, and the part where i got a LOT of answers to my questions.....
"
'Alone, in the silence of night,and the score of thoughtful occasions, we have demanded,
can this self, so vividly central to my universe, so greedily possessive of the world, ever cease to be ?! Without it surely there is no world at all. And yet this conscious self dies by night when we sleep, and we cannot trace the stages by which in its stages it crept to an awareness of its own existence. Personality (centered in the ego) maybe one of nature's methods, a convenient provisional delusion of considerable strategic value.
Wonderin about the link between the sloka and the excerpt ????
Ponder over it ...... it makes a LOT of sense.....
"I" rest my case :)
I read a very interesting part in Bhagawad Gita last night, Krishna says
"
Karmanyevadhikaraste ma phaleshu kadachana
Ma karmaphalaheturbhuh ma te sango'svakarmani -2.47
" Your right is to work only; but never to the fruits thereof. May you not be motivated by fruits of actions; nor let your attachment be towards inaction"
An absolutely beautiful thought.....!!!!!! how many of us work day in and day out, just to quench our selfish needs, just to get recognition, just to reap the fruits of those actions ???? well, i would be lying if i didnt accept the fact, each one of us, at some point or the other, would've done some job just for pure selfish needs.... rite ??? I think i wouldnt be wrong in even goin further and tellin tat we would've done it to satisfy our EGOs ......
It was an interesting comment my friend made in my previous blog abt Ego, well, to an extent it is true watever he has expressed, but i needed a better explaination, a deeper meaning to the whole Ego Question of mine....
I happened to come across this book called "The Science of Life" by Julian Huxley, HG Wells and GP Wells.... Here is a small excerpt from the book which i liked the most, and the part where i got a LOT of answers to my questions.....
"
'Alone, in the silence of night,and the score of thoughtful occasions, we have demanded,
can this self, so vividly central to my universe, so greedily possessive of the world, ever cease to be ?! Without it surely there is no world at all. And yet this conscious self dies by night when we sleep, and we cannot trace the stages by which in its stages it crept to an awareness of its own existence. Personality (centered in the ego) maybe one of nature's methods, a convenient provisional delusion of considerable strategic value.
Wonderin about the link between the sloka and the excerpt ????
Ponder over it ...... it makes a LOT of sense.....
"I" rest my case :)
29.3.07
The Thin Line........
"Self Confidence" & "Ego" ..........
How thin is the line separating them ???? when do u decide wat is the right time to Draw The Line ......?????
I've always been taught to be Self Confident, but rarely do i realize tat my Self Confidence is crossing its limits and slowly turning into the most horrifying (atleast to me) EGO.....!!!!
Hate this internal fight, Hate this Cluelessness,Hate this CoNfUsIoN..... Just hope tat i realize where to Draw the Line and Understand this one complexity in life......
How thin is the line separating them ???? when do u decide wat is the right time to Draw The Line ......?????
I've always been taught to be Self Confident, but rarely do i realize tat my Self Confidence is crossing its limits and slowly turning into the most horrifying (atleast to me) EGO.....!!!!
Hate this internal fight, Hate this Cluelessness,Hate this CoNfUsIoN..... Just hope tat i realize where to Draw the Line and Understand this one complexity in life......
18.3.07
A Matter of Life and Death....!!!!!
Yes...!!!! it was Iron Maiden...!!!! Bruce Dickinson in true flesh and blood, performing live....!!!!!!
Yes...!!!! I was there when the God of Heavy Metal made a storming entry onto the stage....
I screamed when Bruce's screamed......"Scream for me Bangalore".....!!!!!
I was there when the most awaited song 666-The number of the Beast was played....
I found a new meaning to their song The Fear of the Dark ....!!!!!!
To hell with all the critics...........
This is all i gotta tell them.....
...............I WAS THERE........!!!!!!
4.3.07
24.2.07
A Rupee in a MatchBox......
“Please verify the design blah blah blah blah.....”
this msg kept on popping up on my screen even after i had checked the goddamn design for the millionth time.... i was pissed...!!!! decided to take a break from this stupid computer and go out for some fresh air.....
if i had a cam with me tat time, i'd have put the pic, but for now.... imagine this...
3 small kids, 1 girl and her 2 brothers (atleast tats wat i thought) sitting on the road pavement crossed legged and peering over something..... curiosity took the better of me and i had to go chk out wat they were peering over. Well, initially it was a lil difficult to see wat was in the small girl's tiny hands, but when the guy shifted his head, i saw a small matchbox sticking out of her hands. In the box i saw a few one rupee coins stacked neatly...... the girl was trying hard to remove one of them without dropping the remaining coins. I tried listenin to wat the whole conversation was abt, and i could make out bits and pieces of it
Brother : “...... saakagalla.....” (wont be enough)
Girl : “.....ond rupai.....(and wails)......” (one rupee only)
I just couldnt get bak to the world i belongd to (or was tat the same world i belonged to anyways ???)
When i was lost in my own thoughts abt the how neatly the kid was protecting her money, abt how many days (or months) she had to save to fill an entire matchbox with money.......
her brother, who was evidently elder than her, took a rupee coin and went to the corner of the road....
and as always, out of curiosity, i followed him....
he reached a small shop, followed by the other kids, and pointed at the box of chakkli to the lady in the shop.
After much miscommunication, the lady explained to the kids tat watever they wanted, it was worth more than a rupee........and she wouldnt give them until they gave more such one rupee coins.....
The smile the kids gave me after the lady filled their hands with more chakklis than they could ever hold.... was priceless....!!!!!!
wat contrasts in life..... i sit here and write abt some kids on the road, who have to think twice to get a 50 paise eatable, whereas we, dont even think abt them.....!!!!!!!
maybe tat one rupee was their pocket money for the rest of the month, or maybe tat was the money their mother had saved from her drunken husband..... or maybe...... who know????
how many such kids roam around the streets of bangalore ??? wat are “we” doin for them??? well... we all know the answers ourselves......
11.2.07
The Enemy Within....
(The title stolen shamelessly from my cousin's blog)
Nothing can express my feelings rite now, other than the title.......
I have started to blog these days, not out of sheer boredom, but out of sheer frustration..... frustration caused by every god damn thing....!!!!! well, is it just a state of my mind, enroute to finding a worth while thing to do or is it just tat i am not worth anything ????? why does it HAVE to be this way and not MY way???? why does it feel like being sucked into a deeeeeep dark black hole, everytime i take a breath??? why do the shadows haunt me??? why does every memory be so painful??? why are there so many un-answered questions in my mind???? and why does my stupid playlist have to play "Crawling" rite now...!!!!!!!!!!???? WHY ??????
well.... even though i have so many questions, so many doubts, so many cOnFuSeD reactions to every god damn situation, life just moves on...!!!!! thats the best part abt it.... aint it???? or tats what i think.... the intoxicating feeling of life on autodrive.... without the course set by u, really scares the living hell out of me.... makes me think of so many things...!!! ah...more questions....!!!
Why the hell do i even think so much....!!!!!!!!!
as the playlist changes to "Enth E End" the lyrics make more sense, than it used to earlier in my life.......
..........all I know, time was just slipping way
and I watched it count down till the end of the day
watched it watch me and the words that I say
the echo of the clock rhythm in my veins
I know that I didn't look out below
and I watched the time go right out the window
trying to grab hold, trying not to watch
I wasted it all on the hands of the clock.......
but in the end no matter what I pretend
the journey is more important than the end or the start
.........and what it meant to me will eventually be
a memory of the time when I tried so hard.........
- Linkin Park
My belifs and faith, has been proved wrong......guess life just moves on.......
cOnFuSeD...???? then imagine my state of mind...!!!!!!
who asked u to read this till here anyway????
Nothing can express my feelings rite now, other than the title.......
I have started to blog these days, not out of sheer boredom, but out of sheer frustration..... frustration caused by every god damn thing....!!!!! well, is it just a state of my mind, enroute to finding a worth while thing to do or is it just tat i am not worth anything ????? why does it HAVE to be this way and not MY way???? why does it feel like being sucked into a deeeeeep dark black hole, everytime i take a breath??? why do the shadows haunt me??? why does every memory be so painful??? why are there so many un-answered questions in my mind???? and why does my stupid playlist have to play "Crawling" rite now...!!!!!!!!!!???? WHY ??????
well.... even though i have so many questions, so many doubts, so many cOnFuSeD reactions to every god damn situation, life just moves on...!!!!! thats the best part abt it.... aint it???? or tats what i think.... the intoxicating feeling of life on autodrive.... without the course set by u, really scares the living hell out of me.... makes me think of so many things...!!! ah...more questions....!!!
Why the hell do i even think so much....!!!!!!!!!
as the playlist changes to "Enth E End" the lyrics make more sense, than it used to earlier in my life.......
..........all I know, time was just slipping way
and I watched it count down till the end of the day
watched it watch me and the words that I say
the echo of the clock rhythm in my veins
I know that I didn't look out below
and I watched the time go right out the window
trying to grab hold, trying not to watch
I wasted it all on the hands of the clock.......
but in the end no matter what I pretend
the journey is more important than the end or the start
.........and what it meant to me will eventually be
a memory of the time when I tried so hard.........
- Linkin Park
My belifs and faith, has been proved wrong......guess life just moves on.......
cOnFuSeD...???? then imagine my state of mind...!!!!!!
who asked u to read this till here anyway????
29.1.07
solace......
The silence was wat i was craving for...........
One cold Bangalore evening, the feeling of loneliness in the crowd, the contemplative mood, one huge rock, a light drizzle .....and the best company of all......MY THOUGHTS....
A perfect setting for me to get on to some serious thinking.....and oh man....did i think...!!!!
Sitting there, on the Sarada Devi rock, behind the prayer hall of RK Aashram, i got the answers i was looking for.....the answers, for which i had to dig deep....
The sweet sound of the gong brought me bak to the not so sweet reality of life.......but it sure had woken up a much different ME :)
As the Vedantists say........ We are all eternally free, but temporarily bound ......my brain agrees totally..... if only my heart felt tat way......
cOnFuSeD.....????
dont be :)
One cold Bangalore evening, the feeling of loneliness in the crowd, the contemplative mood, one huge rock, a light drizzle .....and the best company of all......MY THOUGHTS....
A perfect setting for me to get on to some serious thinking.....and oh man....did i think...!!!!
Sitting there, on the Sarada Devi rock, behind the prayer hall of RK Aashram, i got the answers i was looking for.....the answers, for which i had to dig deep....
The sweet sound of the gong brought me bak to the not so sweet reality of life.......but it sure had woken up a much different ME :)
As the Vedantists say........ We are all eternally free, but temporarily bound ......my brain agrees totally..... if only my heart felt tat way......
cOnFuSeD.....????
dont be :)
8.1.07
extensions...!!!
"The page u've requested is blocked".....
i was sick and tired of looking at the same old stupid firewall msg on my screen everytime i tried to login to blogger, i mean, what just happened to my freedom of expression?????
but thanx to firefox team, i found this superb extension called deepest sender which can post msgs to almost any blogging service :)
no wonder i love firefox...!!!!
rock on ppl...!!!!
PS. this was just a test post using tat extension....more to come very soon....!!!!
i was sick and tired of looking at the same old stupid firewall msg on my screen everytime i tried to login to blogger, i mean, what just happened to my freedom of expression?????
but thanx to firefox team, i found this superb extension called deepest sender which can post msgs to almost any blogging service :)
no wonder i love firefox...!!!!
rock on ppl...!!!!
PS. this was just a test post using tat extension....more to come very soon....!!!!
1.1.07
letting go....
ever wondered y its so difficult for an average person (like me) to let go of things???
well, i am takin abt "inhibithions"......
i was wondering abt restrictions we put to ourselves...the restrictions which we put, just by pure assumptions and nothin else.....are they justified??? shouldn't we just let go of them???!!!!!!!
as i wonder abt them on this new year's eve.....i am left with a perfect answer.....
wat better resolution for this year than to let GO...!!!!!
well, i am takin abt "inhibithions"......
i was wondering abt restrictions we put to ourselves...the restrictions which we put, just by pure assumptions and nothin else.....are they justified??? shouldn't we just let go of them???!!!!!!!
as i wonder abt them on this new year's eve.....i am left with a perfect answer.....
wat better resolution for this year than to let GO...!!!!!
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